So, have you ever heard something so much that you know it backwards and forwards, but don’t really get it? I have. Yep. You see, I’ve heard people talk over and over about taking leaps of faith. I’ve understood the concept, and honestly, I’ve been frustrated when I have to sit through “yet another ‘leap of faith’ sermon.”
Well, this evening, I heard “yet another ‘leap of faith’ sermon.” The only difference from times past is that this time, the LORD actually used what I knew in my head to minister to my heart.
It is so true that our God speaks and ministers to us, his children, through the circumstances in our lives. Several days ago, I was confronted with a proposition that both excited me and terrified me. This was no small proposition, and my immediate reaction was paralyzing fear. (Just ask my roommate! My entire evening was wrecked!)
Well, through a Bible study in II Timothy, I was reminded that “The LORD has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” So, I recognized that this fear within me was not of God. Not at all.
Then, this evening, I heard a woman share from Acts 10, the passage where Peter is called to minister to Cornelius. Peter had to choose to take a leap of faith into the unknown and unfamiliar world of the gentiles. She used the analogy of bungee jumping. Peter had to obey God’s calling and take that “leap of faith” before God was able to work.
I have struggled since childhood with an extreme phobia of heights. I am the girl that would stand on the diving board for fifteen minutes before jumping. I would let people “play through” as my white knuckles gripped the railing and my body trembled with unreasonable fear. Some days, I would give in to the fear and climb back down the ladder to the safety of firm ground. The fear I felt the other night was so similar to the all too familiar feeling of standing alone and terrified at the top of a diving board, only this decision was on a much larger scale. Do I jump or retreat?
My body physically relaxed as I read Paul’s admonition in his second letter to Timothy. After telling Timothy that the Lord “has not given us a spirit of fear,” Paul goes on to explain that the LORD is faithful to guard what we entrust to Him. There must be no fear in facing the unknown when Christ is our foundation. We may be called to go where our own strength cannot sustain us, but it is in that place that the LORD will find a vessel, empty of pride and pretention, which He can use for His glory. That is what I desire- to be a vessel used of God. If that means I have to jump into unknown, unforseeable space and experience the helpless sensation of falling so that God can step in and do His work, then so be it.
I choose to jump, even to fall, so that God can be glorified in my weakness.
– I Thessalonians 4:24
Terrifying? Only if I forget the One who is able.
So, I will remember Him- and jump.